Monday, May 7, 2012

Today's Random Thoughts

Sometimes I wish I was pregnant so I had an excuse for my ponch.

I need to buy a hula hoop.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

My new thing

I want a bow. Not a pretty pink one you tie in your hair. No. Be serious. One you shoot an arrow with!

Trent has a wicked bow and has been busting it out practicing a  bunch lately and I've been remembering how much I used to LOVE archery in my YW's days. And ever since a couple weeks ago when I made a comment to Trent's mom about how I'd love to have my own bow to shoot (while we were watching Trent shoot his), I haven't been able to get the idea out of my head.

Here comes my embarrassing story of the week, though. Trent and I went out yesterday, just to run errands and check stuff out here and there and we ended up in a hunting/fishing/outdoorsy store. We needed more 22 bullets because I love shooting the 22 and tend to go through a lot when we go out... Well you can see where this is going, we wandered over to the bow counter to check things out. Trent asks if they have anything that would fit me and what do they pull down? A little pink bow. Call me crazy, but I kind of don't like when people hand me pink things just because I'm a girl, maybe especially hunting stuff. Maybe because I've never been a pink girl, maybe if it was purple or any other colour, I wouldn't sniff at it. But like previously stated, I don't want a pretty pink bow. Anyways, they pull the pink one and a much cooler, more hardcore, and let's be honest {better} bow down. They tell us all about them and then give me the good bow to try pulling to see if I can. I can't. I'm sure it looked like I wasn't even trying. It's like doing a crunch/sit-up, you crunch until you hit that point when no matter how long you sit in that position, you're not going any further. Well I pulled with all my might, and that string just stopped and wasn't going anywhere. I vaguely remember the boys across the counter and Trent saying things to coach me on how to pull and that I might have to really push/pull hard to get it. Thanks team, it's still not happening. So they unwind the weight as much as they can so I can pull it. Except I still can't. That's awkward. I'm pretty sure this bow is as beginner as you can get. But wait, there's the pink bow. It goes down in weight a little more than the cool bow. Go figure. Luckily lil pink is a lefty so they have to grab it's brother - the exact same, but camo and righty. They crank him down and hand him over. Oh hallelujah, I can pull it! That would have actually been embarrassing. The boys tell me we can get this righty one in pink, too if I'd like. I wouldn't like.

Good news is we can buy a bow that I can pull and it doesn't have to be pink. The bad news is the weight I'm at right now is 10lbs below hunting regulation so I couldn't actually go out and hunt with Trent if I wanted.

Good news is we don't even have to buy a new bow for me. Because the bad news is I can use the bow Trent got when he was 12. Awkward.

Good news is, the boys at the counter say I should be up to 40lbs (regulation, and strong enough to get the super cool, good bow) within a month or two of solid practice at 30lbs. Bad news is we don't know if Trent's little bow will actually go that low.

Robbie and Bailey picked it up for us this weekend in Raymond and are bringing it back, so fingers crossed that I can use it! If not, I'm officially remotivated to hit the gym again. It's been too long a stint away. I really want a bow! Even after my humiliating efforts at the store, it just made me more excited to get Trent's! Once they got it to a weight I could pull... I love that feeling. I forgot about that feeling. I want a bow!

Friday, May 4, 2012

Nightmares

Does anyone else have nightmares?? Because I have nightmares. And I don't just mean *bad dreams*, I'm talking *so real, so scary, still scared when you wake up, shaking, make you wanna cry* nightmares. And I think as an adult, I'm actually capable of having more terrifying dreams than children, because they're realistic(ish).

When Trent and I were first married, we watched a lot of Criminal Minds at night. I had a LOT of nightmares. Like Trent knew we'd have to cuddle and talk for at least 30 min before sleeping if we watched it before bed. And even then, I still usually had nightmares. I'm now terrified of handicapped people, thanks to that show. I had to stop watching Criminal Minds. I'm not a paranoid person, it didn't ruin my daytime life, but waking up shaking and sweating and so scared, was not my idea of a good night sleep.

Trent thinks it's crazy that I have nightmares as an adult. Quite frankly, so do I. I don't think I had this many nightmares as a kid. Only two recurring ones I can think of. Yet, nightmares I have.

So preamble over, I've had a couple this week.

First nightmare: I woke up in the night and went to the bathroom, and coming back to bed saw a man at the spare bedroom window. I hurried to Trent, in bed, and told him someone was trying to break in. He told me no and not to worry. Then we heard something, and I'm a little more adamant that it's a man trying to break in!  Trent flips into protective mode and tells me to hide under the covers while he goes to check it out. I hear noises and scrapping as two men are arguing and fighting with Trent. Then Trent gets drug into the room and I hear one of the men angrily talking about Trent owing him $500 000. Trent says he doesn't have anywhere near that amount of money and the man says, well we'll just have to take your wife as collateral than. My heart stops. Can they tell I'm in the bed? I'm half shoved down the side of the bed against the wall with Trent's blankets scrunched up like he had pushed them there when he got out of bed. My blanket is scrunched up itself in my own spot, hopefully making them think I also got out of bed. I stop breathing. They can't take me. I'm terrified. Trent yells and fights them more. And then I hear a shot. A body hits the floor. I hear the man tell the other man to find me. Trent is dead?! I want to scream. I can't move. I have to get away. Can they see that I'm hiding here? I think I can hear where they are in the room and think I can get to the bedroom door if they're caught by surprise. But will they be surprised? I shove the blankets off and spring off the bed in one effort. I evade a grabbing arm, and the two men start yelling. Only in my peripheral vision, I see a flash of an image of Trent crumpled on the floor. I choke. I keep running.

I make it outside and start looking for somewhere to go for help. I see dim lights in a building and a security guard of some sort walking inside. I can hear a man behind me, but I don't look. I head for the building screaming and yelling and trying to get the guards attention. The guard sees me and opens the door and I run past, shoving the door shut and telling her to lock it. The man hits the door, yelling and swearing and trying to get in. The guard is startled and scared, but I grab her and tell her we have to get away, does she have a car out back? Yes. Good. We have to get out of here. The guard isn't a very old girl - woman? But we scramble out back and get in her car and take off. The rest of the dream is a terrifying pursuit. A terrifying whirlwind of driving and crashing and swimming and running and barely getting away, and not being able to kill the bad guy, even when I try.

I eventually wake up from this, terrified. I look over and see Trent laying there, sleeping, not dead. I want to wake him up. I want to cry. I sigh instead. I hate nightmares. Hate them.



And just so I don't ruin your day entirely with this horror show...
Second Nightmare: I don't remember exactly what I did, but I think I was wearing a retainer to straighten my teeth a little, but when I took it out, my front teeth were all loose. I don't mean a little loose, like braces loose. I mean piano keys loose. I start freaking out, I can't lose my teeth. I push them back into position and try to put the retainer back on, but it doesn't fit. I have to take it off to reposition my teeth, but taking it off only makes it worse. My sister Michelle is with me, trying to calm me down and help, but I'm a mess of freaking out. Then, as I'm trying to move and position them, my lateral incisor comes out. OUT! I'm freaking out. The root is all bent goofy, I don't even know how it came out. It shouldn't have been able to fall out like that. I try to shove it back in, but it won't go. I wake up. I bite my teeth together and everything feels solid. Hallelujah!