Nightmares

Does anyone else have nightmares?? Because I have nightmares. And I don't just mean *bad dreams*, I'm talking *so real, so scary, still scared when you wake up, shaking, make you wanna cry* nightmares. And I think as an adult, I'm actually capable of having more terrifying dreams than children, because they're realistic(ish).

When Trent and I were first married, we watched a lot of Criminal Minds at night. I had a LOT of nightmares. Like Trent knew we'd have to cuddle and talk for at least 30 min before sleeping if we watched it before bed. And even then, I still usually had nightmares. I'm now terrified of handicapped people, thanks to that show. I had to stop watching Criminal Minds. I'm not a paranoid person, it didn't ruin my daytime life, but waking up shaking and sweating and so scared, was not my idea of a good night sleep.

Trent thinks it's crazy that I have nightmares as an adult. Quite frankly, so do I. I don't think I had this many nightmares as a kid. Only two recurring ones I can think of. Yet, nightmares I have.

So preamble over, I've had a couple this week.

First nightmare: I woke up in the night and went to the bathroom, and coming back to bed saw a man at the spare bedroom window. I hurried to Trent, in bed, and told him someone was trying to break in. He told me no and not to worry. Then we heard something, and I'm a little more adamant that it's a man trying to break in!  Trent flips into protective mode and tells me to hide under the covers while he goes to check it out. I hear noises and scrapping as two men are arguing and fighting with Trent. Then Trent gets drug into the room and I hear one of the men angrily talking about Trent owing him $500 000. Trent says he doesn't have anywhere near that amount of money and the man says, well we'll just have to take your wife as collateral than. My heart stops. Can they tell I'm in the bed? I'm half shoved down the side of the bed against the wall with Trent's blankets scrunched up like he had pushed them there when he got out of bed. My blanket is scrunched up itself in my own spot, hopefully making them think I also got out of bed. I stop breathing. They can't take me. I'm terrified. Trent yells and fights them more. And then I hear a shot. A body hits the floor. I hear the man tell the other man to find me. Trent is dead?! I want to scream. I can't move. I have to get away. Can they see that I'm hiding here? I think I can hear where they are in the room and think I can get to the bedroom door if they're caught by surprise. But will they be surprised? I shove the blankets off and spring off the bed in one effort. I evade a grabbing arm, and the two men start yelling. Only in my peripheral vision, I see a flash of an image of Trent crumpled on the floor. I choke. I keep running.

I make it outside and start looking for somewhere to go for help. I see dim lights in a building and a security guard of some sort walking inside. I can hear a man behind me, but I don't look. I head for the building screaming and yelling and trying to get the guards attention. The guard sees me and opens the door and I run past, shoving the door shut and telling her to lock it. The man hits the door, yelling and swearing and trying to get in. The guard is startled and scared, but I grab her and tell her we have to get away, does she have a car out back? Yes. Good. We have to get out of here. The guard isn't a very old girl - woman? But we scramble out back and get in her car and take off. The rest of the dream is a terrifying pursuit. A terrifying whirlwind of driving and crashing and swimming and running and barely getting away, and not being able to kill the bad guy, even when I try.

I eventually wake up from this, terrified. I look over and see Trent laying there, sleeping, not dead. I want to wake him up. I want to cry. I sigh instead. I hate nightmares. Hate them.



And just so I don't ruin your day entirely with this horror show...
Second Nightmare: I don't remember exactly what I did, but I think I was wearing a retainer to straighten my teeth a little, but when I took it out, my front teeth were all loose. I don't mean a little loose, like braces loose. I mean piano keys loose. I start freaking out, I can't lose my teeth. I push them back into position and try to put the retainer back on, but it doesn't fit. I have to take it off to reposition my teeth, but taking it off only makes it worse. My sister Michelle is with me, trying to calm me down and help, but I'm a mess of freaking out. Then, as I'm trying to move and position them, my lateral incisor comes out. OUT! I'm freaking out. The root is all bent goofy, I don't even know how it came out. It shouldn't have been able to fall out like that. I try to shove it back in, but it won't go. I wake up. I bite my teeth together and everything feels solid. Hallelujah!